god speaks

three times in the last month i have been down with respiratory infections. three drs visits, 3 different antibiotics and days out of work. the immunoglobulin infusions i have been having every 2 months don't seem to work anymore. was i really going to have to spend the rest of my life in search of every breath? literally, i couldn't walk the plant at work with out coughing and becoming winded. doing my laundry downstairs is a huge effort, i have to stop on the way back up the stairs just to catch my breath. so, on my way to work tuesday, i did what we all do when we are at the end of our hope and forget who is really in charge, i cried out to god. i have been reading about king davids heart for god, how i want that in my own life. praying, crying and giving it all over to the king of kings to handle. i got to work, settled in, coughing still and feeling worse than i did last week when i was at the dr. i would have to go back again, my lungs were congested and the antibiotics weren't strong enough to kick it.

(a little history now) every year i do a bunch of baking, to give away to people i work with and people i love. i always have something at work for people to munch on during the weeks before christmas. one of our salesmen, eddie, often shows up to see what i have that day. somedays are more tempting than others and he has to pick up a cookie or fudge.

back to tuesday. eddie walked in to see what i had and noticed an air purifier in the back of my office about 10 feet from me. he asked what it was and i told him. then, god spoke to me through eddie...he said "that machine will make you sick". he had bought an industrial size one for his home and started having sinus problems. a friend of his who sells these systems asked if he had recently had one installed. he said yes, his friend said "that is what is making you sick", and something about the ions putting ozone into the air. ozone, smog, 10 feet away from me for 9 hours a day, 5 days a week for 2 1/2 years. i checked it out on the internet and found numerous articles about how these air purifiers put this poison into your home. of course i turned if off right away. this happened just a few hours after i had my come apart with god. with tears in my eyes and hope glimmering back into my heart i couldn't help but know that he spoke and i heard him. i am still very sick, and have been down since wednesday afternoon after another dr visit. this morning, i got up to make some banana bread for the gifts, and didn't have any eggs. so at 6 am this morning, still dark outside i went to the store. it took a while for me to get all that i needed and the sun was up when i got to the front of the store. gloomy and frozen rain outside, i walked toward my car...and there it was, a rainbow peaking out of the clouds, i even had a lady look to make sure it wasn't my imagination. it was god again, reminding me of his promise that he is with me always, even when i lose hope. twice in a week i have heard from god, with my own ears and my own eyes. i don't always notice the times he speaks but i will be listening more closely now. i have hope for the coming year to get healthy again, without the ozone!