it's been 4 weeks since my surgery and i feel wonderful! this little device is my remote control for my spinal cord stimulator. i have 4 programs that i can increase or decrease the intensity of the stimulator. before the surgery, i was taking four pain pills a day. The pain never went away but the pills would make it tolerable. today, i am loving life. i have more energy and people tell me my face is glowing. no more gloomy gus! when i get home from work i still have energy to play with the kids and to go shopping without hitting the couch first. this little remote has truly given me my life back.
if anyone would have told me a year ago that i would be almost pain free, i wouldn't believe it. god has delivered me from a dreary life of pain. if you have never experienced chronic pain, you won't be able to relate to this at all.
i keep thinking of all the seasons god has brought me through. thinking i had cancer in my lymph nodes which turned out to be sarcoidosis, numerous sinus surgeries, cancer, betrayal from my marriage, depression, back surgery, knee replacement, losing my house, filing bankruptcy and the constant pain. through all of these seasons i have come to know that each and every one was getting me ready for today. forgiveness and healing that i have received and given, grace beyond measure and mercy that i so do not deserve. i am excited for this next season of my life and for what god has for me.
i am so thankful for my children and their spouses, my three wonderful grandchildren, a job with health insurance, a car that is in good shape, and lately my decent health. i have my life back. i feel like i can dream again about the future without seeing it with pain involved. mom and dad will be coming in for thanksgiving. a dream that i had a few years ago will have come alive for me. children laughing and playing outside in misty's backyard, mom and dad just being there and enough food to last a couple of days! i have been blessed more than i deserve, but like my wanting to do for my children, god wants to do so much more for me. not just this thanksgiving, but every day i want to acknowledge all of my blessings.
